I took off work today to look for a new job. No good leads. I desperately need to find something. I don't know how much longer I can do this. I feel like my entire world is crashing down around me, and no one cares. I know that's not true...I have friends (M.J., Bob, Spidey, etc.), but I know I'm destined to live my life alone. I've never been able to maintain success in anything, and no one in my life ever seems to stick around through the rough times. I keep thinking that will change, but it just keeps happening to me over and over again. I just cut my hand cleaning up a spill, I've been sick for an entire week, and I've hurt myself accidentally once a day since Sunday. Maybe some part of me is telling me that I don't deserve to live anymore, and I can't help but think that's not necessarily a bad thing. Dont worry, I'm not quite that stupid, but the thought of it seems to make me feel better. Is that completely insane? My friend "Spidey" is coming to town in June and wants me to drive back to Florida with him and look for a job down there. Maybe moving away and getting a fresh start somewhere else would do me some good. I just can't look at my life objectively with everything that's going on here. I need time to think and evaluate who I am and where this life is headed. If anyone has any thoughs, feel free to leave some comments. I think I'm going to go for a drive and clear my head. Good Night...
Tuesday, May 20, 2003
avril levine rox........so does sum41, my chemical romance and ect...
Posted by: casey | Tuesday, November 28, 2006 at 08:22 AM